3 MORE lessons from the NEXT 100 books

We started the podcast back in June 2016. In the last four-and-a-quarter years, we’ve read and reviewed 200 books on the podcast! We thought it was a great milestone to take a step back and have a look at what lessons we’ve learned from all of the books we’ve read and how they can tie in together.

A couple of years ago when we hit our 100th book, we did our “Top 10 Lessons”. You can listen to that podcast episode here: 100th BOOK – Our Top 10 Lessons. They all hold up pretty well! Feel free to go and check out that episode, on here is a reminder of just the lessons themselves:

1. You’re Gonna Die Someday
2. Be Proactive (realise that you have the power to take action)
3. Get In The Arena, Don’t Sit On The Sidelines
4. Delayed Gratification (long-term satisfaction far outweighs instant gratification)
5. The Power of Questions & The Importance of Curiosity
6. Have A Bias for Action (thinking and planning and dreaming are nice, but action is vital)
7. Place lots of Minimum Bets
8. Effectiveness VS Efficiency: The Best Time Management Tips
9. Listen Before You Talk
10. You’re Either Remarkable Or You’re Invisible

They were the big 10 lessons we tok from our FIRST 100 books, now we’ve thought about what NEW lessons we’ve taken from the NEXT 100 books. We started with 10 mini lessons, but then decided that they all grouped together pretty nicely into 3 BIG lessons:

1. Question The Path
2. Dichotomies (No Single Book Has All Of The Answer)
3. The Myth Of The Silver Bullet

(1) Question The Path

One of the books we loved in this second batch of 100 books was Unscripted by MJ DeMarco. The whole book layed out the “scripted” path, that all of the powers and authorities in our lives have set up a system that we all blindly follow. Governments, teachers, parents, bosses, coaches, leaders…. Whether they know it or not, they’ve created a path that almost everyone follows. If you don’t want to be ordinary, you need to Question The Path.

We’re not saying that the path is all wrong. We’re just encouraging you to think about it. Most people plough ahead – they see the system, they see the game they’re meant to be playing, and they just go and play to win. But very few people actually step back and consider WHY they’re playing the game, or if there may be ANOTHER game that they could play instead.

There is a “normal” way of doing things. A normal way to learn, a normal way to behave, a normal way to get a job, a normal way to start or grow a business, a normal way to advance your career, a normal way to operate in your relationships. This is “the path”. This is what we’ve been taught to follow. But just because this is the common, well-trodden path that is laid out in front of us, it doesn’t mean that it is the ONLY path, or even that this is the BEST path. Sometimes we need to stop and think. Look around. Where did this path come from? Why are you following it? Why are you playing this game and not finding a new game, or even creating your own?

When we’re young, our minds are open and full of dreams. Our hearts race when we think about what may be coming around the corner for us. But as we hit adolescence, we slowly start to put those dreams away in a box. One by one, we remove those dreams from our minds and hide them away. We realise the reality of the “real world” and question if our dreams were ever possible. Every now and then, we may open the lid of that dream box and think about what it would’ve been like if we’d chased that dream instead of wandering down the same path as everyone else. But the older we get and the further away we wander from those dreams, the more painful it becomes to open our dream box. Eventually, we stop looking all together. We convince ourselves that we never wanted those things. The “normal” path is just fine for us: go to school, get good grades, get a good job, keep your head down, work hard enough to get a promotion but not too hard that people start to notice, work, save, buy a house, start a family, retire. The further we walk along this “normal” path, the more committed to it we become. If you fail to reach your dreams, it won;t be because you lacked effort or enthusiasm – it will be because you neglected those dreams and chose the “normal”, uninspiring path instead.

Avoid Competition

The “normal” path is pretty chockers (Aussie slang for “full” or “busy”). Because everyone is doing it, EVERYONE is doing it! For you to climb the “normal” career ladder, or grow your “normal” business, or find a romantic partner the “normal” way, you’re competing with millions of others trying to do the exact same thing. It’s hard to stand out or differentiate yourself. It’s hard to get to the top.

Taking a side step onto a different path may be both harder and easier at the same time. Harder because of all of the social pressure to conform to being “normal”, but easier because you’re competing with less people. If you realise that the path you’re on isn’t the path that you want to be on, it might be time to try a new path. By breaking away from the competition and doing something different, you might be able to find some nice, fresh, clean, clear “blue ocean”. The book Blue Ocean Strategy is a business book, but the analogy applies to other areas of life as well. Most water is red, stained by the blood of cut-throat competition. The only way to win in a red ocean is to be more brutal and more ruthless, slitting more throats and stabbing more backs. But if you can sail away from the bloody waters, you can find some more calm ocean where there is no competition. By differentiating yourself from the masses, you’re no longer competing with everyone else, you’re only competing with yourself.

Forge Your Own Path

It’s not easy to find blue ocean.

The first step is to question the path. Stop, look around, realise that you’ve been sold on the “normal” way of doing things, even if it’s not the best way for you.

The second step, if you decide that the path you’re on isn’t quite right, is forging your own path. This is scary, but not impossible. You might think that you’re not the type of person that can do this. But you are. As the great philosopher Dr Seuss tells us in Oh, The Places You’ll Go! : “you have brains in your head, you have feet in your shoes – you can steer yourself in any direction you choose”. We all have this ability. You need to be proactive and take responsibility for your path. Corporations, governments, schools – they’ve all set up the path for us to follow. But at any time, you can question the path. You can consider if this path is right for you. If it is, great – keep going! The path to success is an obvious one, you just need to be better than everyone else on your path. But if you decide that it’s not right for you, then it’s up to you and you alone to forge your own path. “You’re on your own and you know what you know, and YOU are the one who’ll decide where to go”.

(2) Dichotomies

I (Ashto) went through a phase where I was reading a lot of “either/or” books, books that give you a new lens or a new filter through which to view the world as two dichotomies:

• Linchpin: In your career, you can either be a Linchpin or a Cog
• Range: You can either be a Generalist or a Specialist
• Originals: You can either be an Original or a Conformist
• Mindset: You can either have a Fixed Mindset or a Growth Mindset
• The Slight Edge: You’re choices are either that of a Millionaire or a Beach Bum
• The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People: You have a Circle of Concern and a Circle of Influence
• Blue Ocean Strategy: You can be in the Red Ocean or the Blue Ocean
• How To Fail At Almost Anything And Still Win Big: Talks about Goals versus Systems
• The Obstacle Is The Way: Problems can either be Obstacles or Opportunities
• The Infinite Game: You can either play a Finite Game or and Infinite Game
• The Paradox of Choice: You can make decisions by being a Maximiser or a Satisficer
• Unscripted: You can either follow the Scripted path or go Unscripted
• Turning Pro: You can either play as an Amateur or a Pro
• Thinking, Fast and Slow: You brain can either use System 1 (Fast Thinking) or System 2 (Slow Thinking)
• The Smartest Investment Book You’ll Ever Read: You can either be a Passive Investor or a Hyperactive Investor
• Deep Work: You’re either doing Shallow Work or Deep Work
• Getting To Yes: In negotiation you can either use Positional Bargaining or Principled Negotiation

These are the dichotomies WITHIN books. But going a step further, there are even dichotomies BETWEEN books – where one book will say one thing, one book will say the exact opposite, but both are somewhat true:

• Grit says you need to work hard and stick to things, Originals says you should try different things
• Outliers says you should pick one skill and stick to it until you master it, Range says you should cobble together a bunch of skills your proficient at to make on
• How To Win Friends And Influence People talks about being nice and friendly, The Prince talks about being effective at the cost of being feared or hated
• Some books talk about changing your habits slowly and gradually, others talking about massive overnight changes
• Some say that saving money is important, others say you should invest money in yourself so that you can make more later
• Some books say “follow your passion”, some books say get good first and the passion comes later
• Some books say quit your job and go “all in” on your side projects, others say keep the side projects on the side until they get big enough to justify leaving your job
• Some say you should make your ‘side hustle’ the ‘main hustle’ because you’ll be forced to work harder on it, others say that you shouldn’t be reliant on your hobbies are your sole source of income or you’ll become desperate and jeopardise its long-term viability

In every book you’ll read, you’ll find a sweeping statement. If you read widely enough, you’ll eventually come across another book that gives a sweeping statement in the exact opposite direction. But somehow, both are true!

Our advice: keep reading and keep learning. Take all of these lessons on board. Realise that it’s not an either/or, you don’t have to pick one path and stick to it, but instead realise the importance of both. Both are options for you, both are tools in your tool belt to be used in the right moment. If you can harness the power of both of these opposing forces, you’ll be able to use either one of them when the situation requires it. No single book has all of the answers for every scenario, so keep reading!

(3) The Myth Of The Silver Bullet

We’ve already spoken about the “normal” traditional path or working Monday to Friday, 9 to 5, then spending most of your paycheck on Friday night drinks or Saturday night dinner to make yourself feel good and convince yourself that you’re doing the right thing. Then you might read a book like The Four Hour Work Week or Crush It or Rich Dad, Poor Dad or The Millionaire Fastlane and hear about all of these entrepreneurs that are making truckloads of money and doing seemingly very little work. It’s sounds awesome!! If you can set up an online business or sell someone else’s product or develop some other stream of passive income, you’ll never have to work again!

We love to hear the stories of the overnight success. We want to believe that there is a “silver bullet” that’s been hiding in plain sight this whole time. There is just one little trick we didn’t know before, but now that we know it, everything will be easy! We’re calling this a myth. And it’s enticing. We want all of the rewards without doing any of the work. But in almost all cases, it’s just not true.

Be careful of these myths, and be even more careful of the scammers telling you that they’ve just discovered a silver bullet and it could be yours too… if you just pay $197 for their webinar, then $4,997 for their bootcamp, then $24,997 for their retreat, then $9,997 per month for their platinum membership… then eventually you’ll get the silver bullet… and you’ll be rich… and you’ll never have to work again…

There are “silver bullets” everywhere. In your career, the silver bullet is meeting the CEO of a company at a weekend barbeque and her handing you your dream job on a platter. In business, it’s setting up an online business (eCommerce, drop shipping, or finding an outsourcer to write a Kindle book) then without any work you’re making millions of dollars. In health, it’s thinking that you can wipe out a decade of bad eating habits with a 5-day detox retreat. In relationships, you think everything should be easy and effortless so once you find the right partner you’re home and hosed.

Realise that there are no free lunches. If you want something that’s valuable, you’re going to need to work to get it. It’s valuable for a reason, and that reason is that most people can’t have it and it’s not going to be easy to get. You can get it, you can achieve what you want to achieve, you just can’t do it without investing any of your time, energy or effort. Beware the “myth of the silver bullet”.